What is An Exceptional Life?

An Exceptional Life is not simply a great life or a happy life, it’s a life filled with exceptions. It’s about having and doing the things that other people say can’t be had or done. It’s about working fewer hours, having the job and relationship of your dreams, and being the person you say you want to be all the time. It’s about being the person no one asks “How are you doing?” because you’ll spend the next ten minutes telling them how great your life is. It’s about having it all by creating points of view that differ from your default viewpoint.

Does this involve crystals, magnets, or brainwave training?

I have a hard time with anything new age, energy-based, or with hippy overtones. So my coaching doesn’t involve any of that. People have areas of life where they have limited themselves with a point of view that doesn’t support them. I simply help them see that and alter those viewpoints.

And to be clear, I have zero problem with people using new age or energy-based techniques to get their personal development. I used to judge other coaches and their clients that used crystals or brainwave training but the key I missed was that many of them got power and fulfillment from those techniques. And if that does it for them, great! Most everything that we say is real is made up anyway, so all I care about is that people have a viewpoint that lights them up in life.

For me it often boils down simply to: Be great with people and they’ll be great with you and you’ll have a happy life. If you’re a jerk with people they won’t be great with you and the world will seem pretty crappy.

Does that mean you just tell people what they want to hear?

Not very often. Certainly not as often as many of them would like. I train people to tell the difference between reality and their point of view. When people get really clear on the difference then they can alter their point of view which is where the anger, frustration, upset, etc. come from. I help people shift their view just a few degrees and that shift gives them a whole new world.

Do you tell people what they should do?

Again, not as often as they would like. I occasionally give advice or tips and tricks, but the vast majority of the time I actively refuse to tell a person what they should do. It’s presumptuous. They have known themselves their entire life, I’ve known them a few months or less. I make sure they are clear they have thousands of options and have them pick one that is true to who they are. Then I hold them accountable for that.

How did you start coaching?

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Testimonials

The best way to hone the skills as a Personal Development Coach is to continually experience the power of the coaching process by a fellow Personal Development Coach. Matt Stephans is one of those masterful Coach of Coaches. Using a direct approach that is non-judgmental and supportive, Matt is able to quickly move his client forward in both perspectives and actions. My experience as Matt’s coachee created an awareness of reality vs. the stories that we tell ourselves as well as how those stories do or do not serve us. This transformational change in perspective has had an enormous impact on my relationships both personal and professional.
2018-09-03T21:01:36+00:00
Candace Bixler - Associate Certified Coach - ICF
My husband and I asked Matt to preside over our wedding because Matt is a true soul that cares about the bond of relationship.  Matt then went over and beyond by not only presiding over our ceremony but help create what my husband and I wanted in our relationship.  Prior to the wedding, we had working sessions that were both emotional and impactful.  The wedding ended up being a fantastic success and we thank Matt for all the help throughout the process.

Kim Tryce - Bride

2018-09-03T21:02:32+00:00

Kim Tryce - Bride

My husband and I asked Matt to preside over our wedding because Matt is a true soul that cares about the bond of relationship.  Matt then went over and beyond by not only presiding over our ceremony but help create what my husband and I wanted in our relationship.  Prior to the wedding, we had working sessions that were both emotional and impactful.  The wedding ended up being a fantastic success and we thank Matt for all the help throughout the process.
Matt's been a part of my coaches support group for over 2 1/2 years, and in that time I've benefited from his direct, no-nonsense, clear-guidance approach. Matt can get you right up in the face of the thing you need to be dealing with but can't or don't want to see - directly and gently - so you are free to address it in the best way possible. Best of all, the stories and explanations he uses to get you grounded in a 'coached-life' are some of the best I've heard. You will thoroughly enjoy working with and knowing Matt. I have.

Judith Manriquez  - Coach, ICF

2018-09-03T21:04:51+00:00

Judith Manriquez  - Coach, ICF

Matt's been a part of my coaches support group for over 2 1/2 years, and in that time I've benefited from his direct, no-nonsense, clear-guidance approach. Matt can get you right up in the face of the thing you need to be dealing with but can't or don't want to see - directly and gently - so you are free to address it in the best way possible. Best of all, the stories and explanations he uses to get you grounded in a 'coached-life' are some of the best I've heard. You will thoroughly enjoy working with and knowing Matt. I have.
I had the privilege of having Matt Stephans coach me for about 6 months or so while I was at Little Tesoros and it made a huge difference in my life.  In Matt I had support for issues in both my personal and professional life.  Often I would uncover how my own behaviors contributed to situations at work and home, revealing a whole new way to view a "problem".  The actions that were needed to have a different outcome became very clear, and the drama of it was removed and replaced with positive solutions and results.  Matt is great at reminding me to be in action around things that do not work in my life, instead of living in a constant stream of complaints regarding how wrong things around me are.  One of the keys to Matt’s coaching is that he has you create structures to support what changes you want to make in your life.  This is a very simple thing that can have a powerful impact in having the life you want.

The other major take way I have from the time I spent coaching with Matt is the recognition of my impact on the world around me. It’s quite easy to think you are an island but none of us are, and our actions impact those around us whether we notice or not. When I began to practice noticing this, I was shocked in good ways and bad. I realize how important it is to be responsible for the things I do and when I have not, to acknowledge it. For this, my relationships at work and at home are better, and the people in my life feel I do truly care about them, and that makes me feel incredible.

It was a gift to be able to work with Matt. I feel very grateful to both him and my employer for offering such support and being committed to having people be better for having had them in their life, that is truly exceptional.

Jennifer Gasaway - Front Desk

2018-09-03T21:06:18+00:00

Jennifer Gasaway - Front Desk

I had the privilege of having Matt Stephans coach me for about 6 months or so while I was at Little Tesoros and it made a huge difference in my life.  In Matt I had support for issues in both my personal and professional life.  Often I would uncover how my own behaviors contributed to situations at work and home, revealing a whole new way to view a "problem".  The actions that were needed to have a different outcome became very clear, and the drama of it was removed and replaced with positive solutions and results.  Matt is great at reminding me to be in action around things that do not work in my life, instead of living in a constant stream of complaints regarding how wrong things around me are.  One of the keys to Matt’s coaching is that he has you create structures to support what changes you want to make in your life.  This is a very simple thing that can have a powerful impact in having the life you want. The other major take way I have from the time I spent coaching with Matt is the recognition of my impact on the world around me. It’s quite easy to think you are an island but none of us are, and our actions impact those around us whether we notice or not. When I began to practice noticing this, I was shocked in good ways and bad. I realize how important it is to be responsible for the things I do and when I have not, to acknowledge it. For this, my relationships at work and at home are better, and the people in my life feel I do truly care about them, and that makes me feel incredible. It was a gift to be able...
I enjoy my sessions with you, and I always looked forward to our phone conversations. You helped me look at situations in a different light or angle and that helped me clear up some past blockages that were holding me back, and I thank you for having the insight and pointing those out to me.

Stephen Colburn

2018-09-03T21:07:24+00:00

Stephen Colburn

I enjoy my sessions with you, and I always looked forward to our phone conversations. You helped me look at situations in a different light or angle and that helped me clear up some past blockages that were holding me back, and I thank you for having the insight and pointing those out to me.
Matt has a very good coaching approach. Where other coaches I have had have just been good on knowledge and very wise, Matt started to work with the stuff that really mattered to my future growth, and didn't give up before he was sure I had taken a decision on what to do. Matt really does follow up his commitment as a coach and I feel he truly cares about me reaching my dreams.

Kjetil Bråttvik - Stockholm, Sweden

2018-09-03T21:07:48+00:00

Kjetil Bråttvik - Stockholm, Sweden

Matt has a very good coaching approach. Where other coaches I have had have just been good on knowledge and very wise, Matt started to work with the stuff that really mattered to my future growth, and didn't give up before he was sure I had taken a decision on what to do. Matt really does follow up his commitment as a coach and I feel he truly cares about me reaching my dreams.
Matt has been a go-to-guy for me since day one. In every instance where I have witnessed Matt it was 100% on the elements of fun and attainment of objectives. Matt is the superlative in this field!
2018-09-03T21:08:26+00:00
Matt has been a go-to-guy for me since day one. In every instance where I have witnessed Matt it was 100% on the elements of fun and attainment of objectives. Matt is the superlative in this field!
Matt Stephans is a committed individual to each and every person in the world living the fullest and best life possible.  I'm fortunate enough to have worked with Matt through coaching sessions regarding personal matters in my life.  Matt continued to challenge me as I would approach an area that could be described as dismissive or an excuse.  The work was hard but the reward was great.  Matt was able to help define objectives in my life and see that I could not only get past the trouble spots each of us encounter, but I could thrive while doing so.

Kim Tryce - Team Lead

2018-09-03T21:09:09+00:00

Kim Tryce - Team Lead

Matt Stephans is a committed individual to each and every person in the world living the fullest and best life possible.  I'm fortunate enough to have worked with Matt through coaching sessions regarding personal matters in my life.  Matt continued to challenge me as I would approach an area that could be described as dismissive or an excuse.  The work was hard but the reward was great.  Matt was able to help define objectives in my life and see that I could not only get past the trouble spots each of us encounter, but I could thrive while doing so.
Matt's approach to life is uncommon and freeing. He deals with the facts, rather than getting caught up in the drama of the situation, but at the same time he's compassionate and sympathetic to your concerns. He "gets" what you're going through, and then he gets you out of it.

David Fried - Owner, DKF Writing Services

2018-09-03T21:09:33+00:00

David Fried - Owner, DKF Writing Services

Matt's approach to life is uncommon and freeing. He deals with the facts, rather than getting caught up in the drama of the situation, but at the same time he's compassionate and sympathetic to your concerns. He "gets" what you're going through, and then he gets you out of it.
Matt is an amazing coach.  Due to his straight forward, no non-sense attitude, he has the incredible ability to cut through the BS and get to the heart of the matter. In our conversations he provided the necessary guidance, gave me the confidence that I required and listened to me bigger than I related to myself.

I. Kazim - NYC

2018-09-03T21:09:59+00:00

I. Kazim - NYC

Matt is an amazing coach.  Due to his straight forward, no non-sense attitude, he has the incredible ability to cut through the BS and get to the heart of the matter. In our conversations he provided the necessary guidance, gave me the confidence that I required and listened to me bigger than I related to myself.